Sexual assault is often imagined as an act committed by strangers in isolated incidents. Yet research shows that most sexual assaults are perpetrated by someone the victim knows, often family members, romantic partners, or acquaintances. At its core, assault is usually rooted in entitlement: the belief that one has a right to another person’s body, attention, or affection. This entitlement is basically at the root of most, if not all, sexual assault.
Although anyone of any gender can be assaulted, male-on-female sexual assault is the most common and is reinforced by particular social and cultural norms. Attitudes that foster such assaults are often normalized, shaping how women experience harm and how society responds. Patriarchal norms and myths about sexuality reinforce these attitudes, portraying women as responsible for regulating male desire. This often shifts accountability from the perpetrator to the victim, leading to cycles of victim-blaming and underreporting.
Within relationships, entitlement can be subtle but profoundly damaging. Here, it shows up as the belief that one has inherent rights over another person’s body or attention. Some men assume that being in a relationship, living together, or a partner’s past sexual activity automatically grants them sexual access. This logic ignores the essential truth that consent must be freely given, enthusiastic, and revocable at any time. Marital or partner rape is mostly about control and asserting that the woman’s body exists to fulfill their male partner’s expectations. Not all forms of sexual assault involve physical force, though, as sexual coercion may also be more subtle, occurring through manipulation, emotional pressure, or psychological tactics rather than physical force. However, even if less overt than physical force, long-term sexual coercion inflicts serious psychological harm.
Outside of romantic relationships, entitlement often manifests even more aggressively. Some men interpret friendliness, attention, or perceived attractiveness as permission to catcall, grope, and harass any woman they want in public while ignoring verbal or nonverbal refusal. Some others don’t cross the line so directly; instead of groping or using date rape drugs, they use their authority to directly or indirectly pressure women into sex when they can and use fear of professional repercussions to silence victims.
In some more extreme cases, sexual assault isn’t an expression of desire or even just entitlement; instead, it can be used as a deliberate tool of punishment, control, and humiliation. In those cases, the act itself is primarily intended to inflict suffering, assert dominance, or enforce obedience. These cases are usually even more violent and traumatic than other types of sexual assault, and the use of sex as a means to exert power in this way reveals a lot about the men who do it and society at large. On the part of the man, it reflects a lack of empathy as well as a deep need to assert control, which in many cases is reinforced by society at large through messages that frame the coercion of women as acceptable or even “clever” under certain circumstances.
Ultimately, challenging entitlement is essential to preventing sexual assault. Legal frameworks that recognize assault within and outside relationships definitely help, but significant change requires more than just legal intervention; it requires a shift in societal attitudes. Public discussions should confront cultural values that excuse and encourage entitlement. Empathy should also be encouraged because, at the root of entitlement, there is a subtle lack of empathy—a failure to see that other people (in this case, women) fully have feelings and perspectives just like you. Only by dismantling the cultural and psychological frameworks that normalize entitlement can we begin to foster a society where respect for women is the default.
By Jamila U. O.